Gay or Lesbian Wedding Guest List Questions
Planning a gay or lesbian wedding looks complicated with the legalities involved, not to mention the negativity you’ll meet along the way. Don’t be disheartened because just the thought of actually getting married to your partner is already a huge win. As of this writing, there are only 19 states in the US plus The District of Columbia where same sex marriage is legal.
So if you’re already thinking of your wedding guest list, congratulations! In wedding planning, one of the first things you and your partner ask yourselves is “Who do we invite to our wedding?” While the obvious factors to consider would be your budget, there’s an underlying question that begs to be asked. “Who do we not invite to our wedding?”
Before you start writing down your gay or lesbian wedding guest list, have a sit down talk with your partner and ask yourselves the following questions:
1. Who are the people who’ll always support us, no matter what happens?
2. Who are our biggest cheerleaders?
3. Who’ll be paying for our wedding?
4. If we invite someone who is against our wedding but is a family member (a parent or sibling) can we handle the heat, if it comes to that?
5. How do we envision our wedding day?
6. Do we want to pull out all the stops and have a destination wedding with the people closest to us?
7. Do we want a big bash with over 200 wedding guests or is a small intimate wedding more to our liking?
For hundreds of gay and lesbian couples marrying in the United States, weddings are bittersweet moments. It’s a day to rejoice and celebrate your love for each other legally. It is a triumph over a storm of controversy. And it is a promise of a new life together. Your wedding day will also be one of the saddest moments of your life because there might be very important people to you who have not accepted who you are and your relationship with your partner, and whose blessing is important to you.
Cutting people out of a gay or lesbian wedding guest lists is not unheard of.
And while you may concern yourself with hurt responses from those you’ve failed to invite, think about this:
Should you include in your wedding guest list the aunt who actively supports banning gay marriages in another state? What about your sibling who thinks you’re an aberration and somehow, with the right therapy, you can still change your sexuality? What about your homophobic boss, are you obliged to send him an invitation? This period will be an emotional roller coaster for you both so best be prepared to deal with negativity while focusing on what’s important, which is you and your partner’s happiness.
Deal with the matters that weigh you down emotionally, get them out of the way. Now you can plan your wedding with a clear head, and focus on the excitement of wedding planning. Wedding venue and decorations, wedding themes, what to wear? Will it be a vibrant summer wedding or white winter wedding? Which font should you use on your wedding invitation? Do you send a save the date card or not? Now the fun begins! Read more on how to go about making a wedding guest list properly.
One of the best tips we’ve recieved, and one we’re sharing with you, is to surround yourself with people who love and respect you both on your wedding day. It makes it all the more exciting to embark on a new life together when you’re enveloped in warm well wishes and positivity!
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